noticeably absent

god has been noticeably absent these days. this world is perhaps too much; the pain and suffering of the everyday, the depression and addiction, the poverty and homelessness. this great big gift we've been given and then squandered. our pain perhaps the most toxic emission of all.

god has been noticeably absent these days, and we've all grown immune to the suffering, Iraq, Rwanda, Nairobi, Cambodia. In more places than we can count children live in suffering and die every day, we turn our heads, it is too much.

and then the unexpected, the things that happen on our way to class, leaving our dorm rooms, as we carry our books. we send our precious cargo into the world, this great big world of ours and we hold our breath and hope at best they will exceed our hopes and dreams and at worst will find this world a bit easier than we have found it ourselves. anything less than that is incomprehensible.

god has been noticeably absent these days. perhaps those of you that are strong in your beliefs, your faith, can take these moments and make sense of them, allow them to fall into some sort of context that is relegated to this world alone. i used to walk along you but i've lost my way, and the losing has made the distance wider. i don't know how to reconcile these tragedies and still raise a hopeful child. but yet i hope.

Virginia.

To the young, creative, and brilliant minds who were extinguished today for reasons yet unknown; my heart sits here next to me and we grieve together, tears sliding down my face. My child asks me why i am crying, and i do not have the words. There are no words for this.

Virginia.