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i'm done being courteous, i say, lips smacking on Saturday night. we are sitting on the couch watching an old Al Pacino movie while M looks at some books. done how?, J says. i'm done worrying if everyone is okay. if i want to take a nap, i'm doing it. if i want to go shopping, i'm doing it. i'm a new woman, dude. a woman who does what she wants.
how is that different from now, he replies. you are kidding me, right? i kill myself with this courtesy shit. up, down, up, down. mommy this, mommy that. i'm done.
you go, girl. he says. it's not like anyone was stopping you besides you, reaching over to tickle me and i bat him away.
what's mommy talking about? M says, looking up. she's just telling us stuff we already knew but she's still figuring out. besides, if the mama isn't happy, nobody's happy. J replies. oh. she says. good mommy, you want a star?
it's starting now, people i say, feeling spry. M, go get your pajamas and put them on. she looks at me in horror. whaaaaatt? talk to your old man, little girl, there's a new sheriff in town and off they go. and the next day I slept in and went shopping alone. without a watch. i am woman.
In cleaner parts, I had the pleasure of reviewing a pretty cool organic soap this month for ParentBloggers. the scrub a dub's over in my other crib.
coming up next: jen's taking a little road trip.
twhat?
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- jen
- The story of a free-spirited woman who after much living had a baby and until recently was in charge of a non profit that helped to get people off the streets. But I've left it all behind to move to the jungle and figure out a way to live more sustainably while seeing more of the world. It took us five years and we still aren't quite sure what we are doing but we are doing it anyways.
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36 comments:
you know, i dig this jen voice. step out, sister. stop with the courtesy. go be a regular human with no concern except for yourself. rock it. and then come back, refreshed and caring!
You go, girl! Hope your shopping was successful. Looking forward to hearing all about your road trip.
Heidi
Yay for giving yourself a break (but, um, Al Pacino with the kid around? Brave woman!)--I love your new resolve.
Keep sleeping in as much as you can, honey.
dude, i don't want to hear about any road trips, unless it involves an 5 hour flight east. ok, i'm kidding, but i can dream. xo
We "regular" Moms feel burned out and overburdened on a regular basis...I'm sure one who mothers the world feels it even more acutely. I'm glad you're ready to be good to yourself. It's important.
Weekends at our house are so tough, because my husband's tolerance for the hours spent with the kids is so low.
Some time ago, I made a comment to him about how he just "bails out" if he's had enough, and he got snotty and said, "I didn't know I had that option."
You can bet I reminded him of it on Sunday when, after a particularly cranky morning he said he was leaving and actually refused to tell me where he was going. (It mattered because my car has a flat tire and the other car was in the garage but the power was out so I was stranded.) He came right back (he was only going over to work to put the plow on the truck in anticipation of the foot of snow we're getting today), so I wasn't TOO annoyed - ok actually relieved that he left and the level of tension could dissipate - but he actually had the nerve to say I was "jealous" because I "couldn't" do the same.
"Why is it," I asked, dangerously calm,"that we both seem to think that's true?"
Oh yeah. It's starting NOW.
I'm sorry but I got stopped up short at "we are sitting on the couch watching an old Al Pacino movie while M looks at some books."
WTF!!!! My daughter would NEVER allow such a reality to happen. The Pacino can only come out when she's in bed. NFL football playoffs, on the other hand, she's all for.
Whoooo! Yeah!
You're awesome! Take care of YOU!
This is a side of you I dig.
"you go, girl. he says. it's not like anyone was stopping you besides you,"
Your J sounds like my Josh. He's kicking my rear out the door sometimes to make sure I fill my own meter before filling everyone else's. I need it, though. I don't always take the time I need and want.
Good for you.
I am laughing hard b/c i should clarify we were only watching Al briefly, a specific scene we liked had come on. I should state for the record that M never reads books alone while we watch a movie, lest you all kill me.
it was flukey, people.
Go you! With all the good deeds you do at work, you deserve some "you" time.
roar.
I know what you mean. Probably, like me, you will always give. But it is ok to put aside courtesy and doing things for others.
In fact it is downright necessary. makes others appreciate you more.
dude. roadtrip? Where?
I'm totally with Mad and clearly need to go to your school of "hear me roar" if watching a movie while my children entertain themselves sound like a wild, wild fantasy.
Good for you, Mama!!
I think this might last a day at my house.
Sigh.
:)
Damn, I gotta try that. Although I think my husband would just smirk at me and say, "Listen to you, reproductive wonder!"
But the roar sounds great coming from you...
Road trip? To Canada?!!! Unlikely. A girl can dream.
Yay Jen!! Keep on roaring :)
good for you sister - and I can't wait to hear about the roadtrip!
woo-hoo!
I've resorted to taking a day off and not telling anyone if I have to. Sigh.
Two words:
AWE. SOME.
:)
This sounds like my voice lately. I've started going to the gym in the mornings, leaving the hubby to watch the kiddo. Fuck it!
Get back Loretta!
You rock. I wish i could have seen M's face.
damn, Gina!!
Good for you! Well done!
You go on with your bad self and give a little Jen time to Jen. Not one of us would say or even think you don't deserve.
You go, lady!!
roarin' for you over here...
and the star..too cute M!
Now why - after 15 years - have I never done that!!! Too funny - you go girl!
Hey - thanks for coming over and leaving the well wishes - I am fine - only need to remember about that bra thing the next time I ever have to call 911. Hope to see you tomorrow. Kellan
I'm lovin' this Jen. Preach it, sista! (And I'm also lovin' the support you got from your family when you issued these proclamations).
Way to go girl!
Sounds really good. I'm so glad you are being a bit more proactive about getting the rest you need.
you and me both. i came home from a weekend at my mom's with my kid (while husband stayed home), dropped child in front of daddy, and took a long hot bath with a glass of wine and a trashy magazine and a scented candle. and a locked door. boy, did i need that.
shopping without a watch.... oooh, i'm drooling. i don't even go GROCERY shopping without a watch!
That cracks me up that J said "she's just telling us stuff we already knew but she's still figuring out." Sounds like the perfect guy. Maybe he would like to speak to my husband about this . . .
Anyway, hope you enjoyed your day without a watch, that sounds perfect.
Good for you... ;D
Shopping without watch,ohh, so cool! I'm a bit jealous ;P
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