I was interviewed by a news producer the other day (ahem, I. Want. To. Share. But. Can't.) and during the course of her interview she wanted to know why I thought homelessness was a problem in our communities. The camera was on and I was of course simultaneously worrying about looking stupid and of course, whether my hair looked okay so I started to lose my train of thought. I started talking, babbling really, and replied with some sort of wingnut response about freedom. About how I can't be free if other people aren't. And she stopped taping and looked quizzically at me and asked what freedom had to do with homelessness.
And for some reason her question made me aware of this anger I carry. Anger that there aren't easier solutions. Anger that homelessness exists. Anger that we still keep asking silly questions. Angry that I feel angry. I meant what I said, but the more elaborate answer is something along the lines of homelessness is a problem because we are choosing to allow others to suffer in exhange for consumerism and capitalism. That we have purposefully set up a system where we need weak people to boost a few strong people. That we care more about our living room furniture than we do our neighbors. So I told her all of this with the camera off and she smiled and nodded and I asked her if she wanted me to repeat it on camera and she gently told me it wouldn't work but that she appreciated my position.
She turned the camera back on and we finished the piece with different questions and after it was done I asked her why people were so afraid of hearing what people really think and she looked at me and smiled and didn't have much of an answer. I figured it was either because a) she thought I was insane or b) didn't really care and was just doing her job. And either way I left a bit frustrated because I still don't know how to get my point across in a way that isn't so critical of everything else.