Sunday, October 21, 2007

Game 7


You looked fantastic last night. Everybody thought so. We all toasted you with our beers and cheered you all the way to the 12-2 Game Six victory. But Shilling, you looked a little tired. You should rest, we'll need you in the Series. And it might be the last time you play in a Red Sox uniform, so cowboy up. 41 isn't that old.

And to JD Drew, no one believes the smack they've been talking about you all season. Nice job hitting that grand slam - that 70M was well spent after all. What? I'm just saying.

Francona, you are a hell of a nice guy and I love watching you handle the media when they interrupt your sunflower seed spitting during the game. Better that than the tobacco you were chewing a couple of games ago. Not so pretty all that spitting, but I understand. It's been stressful. And your peers are getting canned.

Manny, don't be a smuck tonight. It's not funny anymore and you just look like an asshole. When you hit a homerun, run, dammit. Don't stand and stare. Don't gloat. Just run.

And Papi. Hit the ball. Hard. That's all you've got to do. And run when you hit it. Stop acting like Manny.

Dice K - 103M. That's all I've got to say to you. 103M. You better cowboy up, too.

And to my favorite catcher, the ever-adorable and always hard working Jason Varitek. Nice thighs. Love you. Call me.

Play ball, gentlemen. And make us proud.


flutter said...

Play ball like gentlemen..hmm? Cowboy up is a favorite phrase in our house..

God I love baseball.

Pgoodness said...

Can't wait for the game - hubby was randomly wanting the Indians to win, but I put the kabosh on that! Cleveland? PUH-LEASE!

slouching mom said...

I love that you love baseball, multi-faceted you.

Heather said...

Go Red Sox! I just love them all. Well spoken words to all the players.
Varitek is one of my absolute favorites..a true gem! If his voice were an octave lower I'd be all into him. ;-)

Enjoy (I hope) watching!

Came by way of needs new batteries


crazymumma said...

Couldya just come up here and sit with my man during the games?

He needs a woman in his life who understands him.

Arwen said...

OK. I thought Varitek was mine but I am willing to share (I was so upset after 'he who should not be named with the initials of JD' and he 'went to the Yankees, aka the dark side,' and now 'I don't know what I ever saw in him in the first place left').
I am sort of sweet on Mike Lowell too.
I watched the game last night and I loved trying to explain to my daughter what a grand slam was and then Drew showed my 6 year how to do it. How cool is that?
I am so excited for tonight.
So excited.
I will rub the buddha belly and knock on wood.

Mrs. Chicken said...

Go Tribe! ;)

Kyla said...

The last one was my favorite, clearly your favorite as well. ;)

Tabba said...

i don't even watch baseball & you've got me interested.

very funny post, Jen.

FENICLE said...

I love a good trash-talkin' - smack swapping game!!!!!!!!!!

Amanda said...

Feeling proud, but crossing my fingers that posting this before the top of the ninth won't jinx it.

Go Sox.

jen said...


Anonymous said...

You're hilarious jen. I watched with family here, Ohio'ans and Mainers. Talk about a lively experience!

Anonymous said...

I am so looking forward to the world series!

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Jenn said...

I can tell you this now--I was hoping and praying for the Indians.

Mostly because of Manny--just can't stand that asshole.

Oh, and a boy named Grady Sizemore (no need to recount his post-season struggles, we all have our little slumps).

He can call me anytime.

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