Thank you for all your kind words regarding the parenting skills exhibited over at Casa Talia. I spent a day or so strutting around like a fat peacock. But as such, you deserve an update, because god knows I can't leave you with the wrong impression. When I picked M up yesterday the teacher took me aside (oh, the asides!) and said that M used her STOP! NO! technique four or five times as needed until it was apparent she was not going to be listened to. And then she decked the kid.
My Inside Voice was cracking up. But then the teacher said and I couldn't even really get mad at her because she did use her words several times first.
Couldn't even get mad at her? Seriously? So my Outside Voice said I would hope not. And I would expect that you would either intervene before it gets to that point or understand that M has to deal with it in a way that works for her.
Well, said the teacher, they've had no problems since.
Nicely done, kid. I might only say that with my Inside Voice, but I'm thinking it just the same.
And it's worth saying that the friend who keeps going ballistic on her isn't a bully. I've spent some time with her and she seems to process things differently but I have little experience with organic differences so I am not going to speculate. And I've spent a bit of time with her mom and it's obvious she's weary and heartbroken because she is aware of the slowly emerging things that are going to make K unique (and lovely and perfect) in her own right. That doesn't make it any easier on M while she's getting pummeled, but there are always two sides to this sort of thing. In fact, her mom came up to me yesterday (apparently she's had her own share of Asides!) and said how sorry she was. And because I don't quite know how to navigate Conflict With Other People's Kids yet I co-dependently said Oh, it's fine, really. I think they are both participating. And her mom replied, No, I don't think so. She looked sad, and I felt sad too.
And I didn't know what else to say. So let's not get all excited about the parenting skills at Casa Talia just yet. We've still got a ways to go.