capturing the flag

We never use sitters. Friends sometimes, family when they are here. I had a bad sitter experience when she was a baby and since then I just haven't felt the occasion to leave her with people we do not know. Daycare, when she was still going, that was a necessary evil of sorts but otherwise we've simply not. So when the opportunity arose for her to spend a few hours at a party of sorts, one that was for kids and not intended for parents to stick around we signed up with a bit of trepidation. M's wise, she knew this was different. I'm staying by myself? she asked and we talked about it and she said she wanted to do it. So we dropped her off with the requisite change of clothes and with eyes in the rear view mirror drove out of the parking lot. We were slightly giddy, it's Saturday night and what should we do? Three hours isn't a long time, not really long enough for a movie unless the timing was right. Drinks? We briefly glossed over the notion of dinner and decided instead to head back home, illicitly sneaking inside kid free and locked the door and spent the next while at a rather fantastic party of two. Later we snuck back out still kidless and feeling rather full of ourselves stopped at Whole Foods and perused the deli section picking up odds and ends, reveling in our momentary freedom and sheer adultness, keeping pace with the young childless hipsters who so cavalierly wandered the aisles.

Our carriage approaching pumpkin, we race back and head inside to pick her up not knowing if she'd spent the last three hours in misery or simply had a really good time. The latter, blessedly the latter was obvious, she was exhausted and happy, showing off her newly homemade kangaroo and asking when she could do it again.

And as we drove home in the dark, city lights reflecting off the windshield I place my hand on the back of J's neck, he glances at me with a soft smile while M chatters it up in the back. It doesn't take much to feel like a grown up again, a woman, I murmur and he smiles again and nods as we three head back to our home.