RSS Feed (xml)1. To the makers of Charmin toilet paper: What gives? You make one kind of paper for the US and one for everywhere else? Do you think people here don't deserve to wipe their asses the same way as folks in the West? The crap you peddle here is ridiculous, I can't believe you put your brand on it which goes to show how little you must think of us, we who still need to wipe our asses even outside of the States. It's so thin it falls almost off the roll, and are the smallest rolls you can imagine. What gives, makers of Charmin?
2. What gives, makers of ice cream? Have you not found a way to import your wares into this country, so that we are forced to rely on the local ice cream, which is really just frozen milk and air and generally filled only about a third of the way up the container. What gives, Dreyers, Breyers and Baskin? There's a market here waiting for you. I don't even like ice cream but my kid does and this might be the least you can do.
3. Jungle bugs. You dudes are such suckers, literally. Must you bite us into oblivion? Must you be so creepy, falling off the walls and popping out in the dark? J stepped into a tick nest and who had to pull out 15 of you little suckers? Me, that's who. Using tweezers that once were for my eyebrows but since I haven't worn make up in a month haven't had to use till now) That's just gross, jungle bugs. The frog I accidentally grabbed this morning when reaching into my washing machine? This goes for you too, buddy.
4. What gives, sudden rainstorms? I'm feeling decidely amazonian, watching my freshly (and frog free) laundry swaying in the breeze between two palms like little prayer flags when suddenly it starts pouring, pouring, pouring. I think you like seeing me race out to the line and snatch things off like a crazy person only to stop raining as soon as I'm done. I get it, I'm a newbie. You could go easier on me is all I'm saying. Stop laughing at me.
5. What gives, jungle roads? People drive crazy, there are potholes and craters everywhere and I literally bounce along everywhere I go. You try carrying home eggs in a bag (no neat little egg cartons here folks) down those roads. Be sure to watch for the wild horses. And the dogs. And the pigs. And the roosters. And people. It's like Mr. Toad's Wild Ride every single day. No matter that M loves it, she rolls her window down all the way and hangs her head out screaming HORSES PIGS DOGS CHICKENS everywhere we go. No matter if that's really cute. Ok, it matters some. I don't really mind you that much, jungle roads.
The lovely Painted Maypole has kindly offered to facilitate getting supplies to M's jungle school. She is happy to have folks ship the donated items to her in the States and then she'll forward things along in one package OR she's offered to accept donations via paypal which she'll use to then purchase educational items for the classroom. If you are interested in either option, please email her directly at pntdmaypoleATyahoo.com. Isn't she the coolest chick ever?
Here's what the school looks like, the outside of the classroom and part of the playground. More pictures coming soon.
So if you'd still like to contribute to stocking a little Central American preschool with much needed educational supplies, this might make it easier for you. You can also scroll down to my Full Moon post and read the list of stuff they need. And for everyone who has already contacted me, I thank you so much. It's consistently humbling and amazing how this community of ours always seems to say yes.
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